Sugar and Running

It is officially day 9 of my quest to be without sugar for a while. My cravings are worst when I’m hungry, but usually once I eat, I’m okay. It’s interesting to see what I crave when I’m off of sugar completely, because it’s never what I expect. The last time I tried it, I had hard cravings for chocolate and ice cream. The ice cream made sense, but not the chocolate, because up to that point I had never really cared for chocolate. NOW I do, boy howdy. It’s like going off sugar made me realize how much I actually LOVE the stuff.

Anyway, this time, I’m craving soda (which I never even drink when I’m NOT avoiding sugar) and slushies from QT. They’re like Slurpees except BETTER because they have a strawberry banana flavor and a pina colada flavor that I like to mix and the flavors are super intense and they blend together in this tropicalish smooth taste of awesome.

Luckily I just ate so writing about that isn’t driving me completely insane.

Green and I are still in moving limbo, but we get to move into our new place TOMORROW!! HUZZAH!!!! In the meantime, however, we’ve holed up in one room of his parent’s enormous house and I haven’t done a whole lot of moving around. The house is so big that we’re both like, “I’m hungry/thirsty, but the kitchen is all the way downstairs…SO FAR AWAY…”

The apartment we’re moving into is a nice, one room efficiency and we are PUMPED to be able to just walk maybe eight steps and be in the kitchen. The whole experience of being in a huge home is reminding me just how much I ultimately want the smallest home possible.

In other news, the lack of movement is taking a toll on my state of well-being. My body is like “WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING TO ME, MY GOD, MY BEAUTIFUL MUSCLES, THEY MUST MOVE, YOU MUST FIX THIS, I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH”. And I’m like, “It’s okay, body, I just bought Viva Pinata for the DS, look, we can play that for four hours.” And then my body’s like, “Oh, okay.” And then four hours later, it’s like, “WHAT THE FUCK WHY DID I AGREE TO THAT NOW I FEEL EVEN WORSE.”

So I’ve decided to work my way through the Couch to 5K program once again. I’m in the mood to do some running, and I have definitely spent the majority of this week on the couch. Anyone interested in doing it with me? I want to start today, provided I can find appropriate shoes. The program is laid out here. The first week is really easy. I think my legs will appreciate it.

Cycles of Self-Respect and Self-Neglect

I haven’t been posting too much recently because I haven’t been in the best of moods, but I’ve felt that if I’m trying to post stuff that makes other people feel good, I should probably feel good myself.


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Unfortunately, the truth is, I’ve been in something of a slump. I haven’t been going to yoga, I’ve been eating lots of ice cream, and I’ve been spending hour after hour locked in front of my computer watching Project Runway on Hulu. (By the way, I’m officially out of Project Runway episodes to watch, does anyone happen to have seasons 1-6 on DVD that I could borrow and watch obsessively?)

I’m getting dizzy spells when I stand up and I’ve broken out in my yearly summer rash. I’m a non-stop itch machine. Green and I are trying to move out of our apartment and all I want to do is lie on the floor and play Animal Crossing. (That’s not true, all I want to do is lie on the floor and watch Project Runway. But I’m out.)

In addition, I’ve noticed my waking temperatures (which I’ve been tracking every morning since going off the pill) are extremely low, in the 95 – 97 degree range. This could be a sign of thyroid issues, which might explain my dizzy spells, my rash, and why I’m lethargy-prone. I really don’t want to get it checked out, though, because I’m terrified of a positive diagnosis, and I do not want to be on thyroid medication.

The tipping point came yesterday, when I broke down in a fit of tears for no discernible reason.

And all this time, I’m thinking, “I should really blog about something,” but I’ve been avoiding blogging about my miserable mood because Jessica Mullen recommends only blogging about what you want more of, and I certainly don’t want more of my miserable mood. The “post-what-you-want” method works in theory, except for the fact that avoiding posting because I’m not in a great mood is just making me feel worse, and less authentic.

The truth is, I am a cyclical being. Ever since I started to be more health conscious, I’ve gone through cycles of being super on top of things and feeling great, to lying in slumps of absolute misery. It happens. I think it’s almost worse to get my hopes up thinking THIS TIME it will be permanent, because then when I fall off the wagon, I spend extra time beating myself up about the fact that I’m not being healthy like I know I should (and can) be. Which sets me back even further.

So my new motto, which I’ll repeat once more, is: IT HAPPENS. There are times when I let my health slack and I pull inward, staying home more than I go out. It happens, and I know I’m not the only one it happens to, either. So perhaps reading about my current temporary setbacks might make someone else feel less guilty about their own, because I think it is natural to be cyclical. It can’t be summer all the time, there has to be winter to balance things out.

Learning this stuff is a lifetime journey. Living healthfully, especially in a society that promotes dis-ease and quick fixes, is tough.

The good news, however, is that the more years I spend learning about health, the shorter my slumps get, and the longer my good stretches last. If nothing else, I can look forward to the fact that it can only get better from here. Not only that, but because of how much I’ve learned in the past, I know exactly how to fix it.


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My constant search for curing the problem and not the symptoms will never end. When I get to the point where I feel so bad that I know it’s time to get back on track, I ultimately find articles or books that point me in the right direction. This time, I’m giving cutting out sugar another shot. Five years ago, I did it for a month, but I ate lots of fruit and honey and felt miserable the entire time. It turns out that honey and fruits are just as bad for your system as refined sugar.

The stars seem to be aligning on this one: I know it’s sugar that’s slugging me down, and I’ve been reading Sarah Wilson‘s “I Quit Sugar” series on her blog for tips and support. Incidentally, Sarah Wilson also blogs about naturally healing and living with auto-immune disease (which includes thyroid issues).

The icing on the cake: A friend of mine on Facebook announced that she’s about to start her own 60 Days Without Sugar Challenge, and would anyone care to join her? Well, I love me a good challenge (and this one comes with a prize for the winner! A $25 gift certificate to Amazon.com, heck yes!), so I’ve signed up. The challenge starts July 6th, but I’ve already started, because I’m sick of feeling terrible. If anyone else wants to try this with me, check out Sarah Wilson’s blog and we’ll rock this out.

During slumps, it’s important to remember that they are only temporary, and that you have the power to get yourself back on track. At the same time, it’s just as important not to beat yourself up. We are human beings after all, and if the worst thing we’re doing to ourselves is having a few pints of ice cream and sleeping late for a month or two in between long stretches of honoring our bodies, I’d say we’re doing pretty well.

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